Two under Two

I have now been a mother of two babies under the age of two for six weeks. Whew, I wasn't sure I was going to make it this long. The days have been short and the nights have been long. I have had some bad mommy moments that I'm glad are behind me. I regret the times that I've lost my temper with Judah. It's a whole different world now. Before, I was only worried that Judah was going to hurt himself, and now I'm terrified that he's going to hurt Evie. My worst moment over the last six weeks happened the first night I was alone with Judah and Evelyn. My mom had returned home and my husband was at work. Evelyn was napping in the swing and Judah and I had been playing. I started to clean up and opened the coat closet to put up some coats. All of the sudden, I hear, "catch Evie!". My stomach dropped into my shoes when I heard the wailing of my infant and looked around the corner to see a giant dog toy sitting on her lap. I don't even remember what I said to Judah, I think it was just incoherent muttering. I was so upset/confused/concerned/ticked. I cried and Evie cried and Judah cried. I felt like a failure. She was fine and hopefully, Judah is not scarred for life by his crazy mother.
   Despite the "kong incident", as we refer to it, life with two littles is pretty great. Evie is a fairly calm baby and thankfully does not require the amount of attention that Judah does.
Because, I know lots of moms struggle when their second is born, I want to share what has gotten us through this learning period.
1. Don't be afraid to ask for help-

Super Nana to the rescue

  I was scared to death at the idea of trying to keep two small children alive, so scared that I had no shame when I asked my mom to stay for an extra week. The same goes for postpartum depression and nursing issues. You are not an island , nor are you the first person to have a baby. Seriously, there are counselors and lactation consultants for a reason. Don't be afraid to ask for help, it doesn't mean you're weak or incapable, it means you are human. Bonus on this one, you will more than likely receive help and get to take a shower or nap or whatever it is that you need and you get to practice humility!

2. Make Freezer Meals-

 Before Evelyn joined our family, my mom and I made about 10 different meals and divided them up and froze them. My favorite is the Baked Greek Chicken, because we froze it in individual bags. So, whenever I need a quick lunch or dinner I pull out some chicken and heat it up and we throw it over salads or eat with sweet potatoes. I also joined a freezer meal group at my church. This group is amazing, not only do I leave with 4 completely delicious freezer meals, but I get to enjoy the company of other ladies. I highly suggest joining or starting one of these groups.

3.Mommy friends to the Rescue-

I have been super blessed to have an awesome community of mommy friends. Most of my mom friends are from church but I have also sought out other friends in person and online. I've made friends with some ladies in a cloth diapering group on Facebook (Peace. Love. Applecheeks) and it  has been so nice to have community wherever I am- even during 3am feeding. So, join a mom group in your area and seek out other moms from your church. You won't agree on everything but you're moms and share the love that you have for your children. I will warn you- if you don't have community, you will quite possibly drown. And we all know that husbands are amazing, but they don't necessarily understand the "crazy" the way that another mom will. 

 4. Be Kind to your Husband- 

Even if your hubby doesn't totally get the "momstyle" that is now your life, he is your husband. I've seen and heard a whole lot of husband bashing from tired and stressed out moms. It makes me sad and worried for those families. Your husband is part of the reason you get to be a mom! And if you stay home with your kids it can be easy to take out your stress on your hubs when he gets home ( I'm speaking from experience). I've found though, that my husband loves being a dad. I forget that and try to play parent  all by myself, when in fact, there are two of us. I challenge you just like I am challenging myself to trust your husband and be kind to him. He is your teammate and really in the end, it's not your mommy friends or your parents or other voices of influence that are there with you in the trenches or dugout (whatever bedtime is like at your house). He's your person and he is also the father of your children. Take time to thank him and show him the love and respect that you also want to be shown.

5.Take Time for Yourself- 

this is a big one and is seriously overlooked. Sometimes taking time to yourself looks like getting to take a shower without wondering if the toddler is drawing on the baby with sharpies and sometimes it means going to Target by yourself and drinking a Venti Chai Tea Latte (dreamers gonna dream!). My favorite time to myself activities include: going to the gym, taking a shower, going to check the mail, running errands, watching an episode of something after everyone goes to bed, sewing, writing letters and Bible Journaling. Getting time to yourself only happens during naptime or if you have a someone to take the kiddos off your hands for a bit. So, take the time when you can and let it refresh you. Don't feel guilty when you get time to yourself- you will be better because of it and so will your kids. 

6. Wear all the Babies-

Babywearing has saved me this go around. I wore Judah in my wrap and Ergo carrier quite a bit, but it has been a complete game-changer with a 2nd baby. Putting Evie in my ring sling is about the only way I get Judah down for a nap most days. There are about a million different carriers and it can get confusing to navigate the Babywearing waters, so if you have any questions, please send me a message- I would love to help! 

7. Cherish This Time- 

I know this sounds cliché and a little lofty, but this time with your babies is only going to last a short while, so enjoy it. Take in all the baby snuggles and toddler cuddles. Take the good with the bad. Yes, toddlers are jerks sometimes, but so are adults so you've got to cut them some slack. 

All of these things along with some serious prayer have helped me make this transition to a mother of two. 

I know there are probably some things that I'm leaving out. What helped you make this transition? I'd love to hear your tips! 

Until next time, 

Emily